Early Christmas Want List

I want friends overseas to come back healthy.

I want the friends that have already made it back not to go back over.

I want a car that can run on water therefore having no reason for us to have friends overseas right now.

List to be continued...

Beef, it's good for your fart

Ever eat a burger that tasted really good. Sure we all have. How about eating a burger that tasted really good and a half hour later you fart. doesn't smell like roses now does it. Thats beef your farting there. I don't know about you but I've never met a cow that smelled like roses. This entry is brought to you by the Corporation for Public Beef Flatulation Awareness. We strive to make everyday a beef flatulance free day. Choose your beef wisely.

Slonp!

I've decided to come up with a new word. Slonp just popped in my head while I was drinking some tea in the breakroom here. They were talking about shorehouses and what types and colors of paint they should use to make their homes more attractive. One of them actually stated she was going to paint her house pink. "I like that idea, me too!" stated the other one. Now the first one was clearly perturbed by this development and retorted "maybe I'll paint the window frames in purple" hoping that the other one gasp in horror and disagree. Well she didn't. They both dug the ideas of pink shore homes with purple window frames.


Thank goodness this tea is so damn good. Otherwise I might have thrown it at the 2 harpies.

Woo Fwuckhead

I just want to leave a big "FUCK YOU" to the guy who nearly smashed into my truck last night.
I bit my tongue while swerving to miss you cocksucker. So now when I talk I sound like a smacked ass in the morning.

Here's an example:

Me: "Wood Mornwing Boff"
Boss: " What's the matter?"
Me: I bwit mwy tongue last night"
Boss: "Ouch"

Meanwhile theres just 3 days to Halo2 and one week to my qualifier for the WSOP.

I'm 5 and it's X-Mas Time

Halo 2 is a little over a week away and frankly I can't wait.

I haven't been this excited over something to play with since I was a kid at Christmas time.
I can remember the hours looking at the Sears Wish Book and seeing the Sega Genesis with it's vaunted 16 bit graphics and thinking I would sell my left nut to own one. I would read that page over and over again knowing that it would soon be there under my tree on December 25th.

This is the feeling I have now for Halo 2.
I can't describe it other than pure joyous anticipation. I actually be able to get a game in with some old chums I've missed along the way. People are calling out of work staying home just to play this one title online. I can't wait to order a pizza for lunch while playing Slayer for the 6th straight hour with friends.

Please hurry Santa. Petey has been good this year and my grades are really good. Santa I have to plug 50 rounds into someone online...quick Santa... hurry up.