Friday, May 27, 2005

But what do I get???

So me and Ms. J are trying to figure out our Friday night when I suggest shopping. "Good you still have to buy me stuff with your income tax return." "Say What?" I snort back, "You didn't buy me anything with your refund sweetie so why should I buy you something?" "But I did buy you something, I bought myself nice looking clothes so I can look good for you when we go out."

Fuck, they've got all the bases covered don't they gentlemen?

In other rants it's so fucking lame I can't take my complete Forza Motorsport garage on the road with me. The memory unit can only hold 5 cars max.

Wednesday, May 25, 2005

One big fucking fish...

Check out this link:

Tell me thats not the sexiest thing to ever happen to a fisherman.! I wish I could experience a fight like what that fish would have given. I've been doing mostly bass fishing this spring totally avoiding trout. This story has me thinking about catfish fishing though. I'm going to need a bigger rod.

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

A horse named Condom

Say your at a horse race park and there is a horse named "Condom" in the 5th race.

Here's some highlights from the commentators as the race is run.

Beginning of race:
"They're having a hard time getting Condom into the stall, they may have to push him harder."

At the start:
"Condom breaks out of the gate!"

Mid Race:
"Condom's got a great rhythm going in the rear"

Approaching the last turn:
"Here's comes Condom, Here comes Condom!"

Down the stretch:
"And look at Condom explode! He's all over the track!"

Stupid Star Wars fans.

Just click the link below, we don't know HTML here:

Monday, May 23, 2005

X. Y. Z.

Nothing sucks more than sitting at your desk at 11:30 am and just realizing you've been walking around all morning with you zipper down. This week rocks already.

The vacation starts Friday night.

Sunday, May 22, 2005

How the mighty have fallen...

I don't need to say anything. Let these pics tell the sad tale... click the link.


Friday, May 20, 2005

Too good not to share

Just click the link and laugh your ass off.

The "G" File & Stromboli's on the Grill

Hiromi Oshima, seriously I cannot get enough of her right now. Google away but beware most images will not be worksafe. She's nearly surpassed Kim Smith in my "Godzilla" file on the home PC. Why is it called the Godzilla file? Well like Godzilla it just keeps getting bigger and more powerful. It has the potential to destroy everything in it's path and it emanates radiation (like everything else to do with a PC.

Also it's the "Godzilla" file because I know for a fact that no one will look into it if they hopped on my PC. It goes back to when I would hide VHS porn in my old Godzilla movie covers. I knew no one would come into my room to borrow a Godzilla movie thus I could have them right next to my TV ready to go at a moments notice.

I've started experimenting with different foods on the grill. Last night I tried a stromboli stuffed with sliced steak, cremini mushrooms, onions and green bell peppers. I sauteed them all first and then threw them into a simple crust along with tomato sauce and buffalo mozzarella. It came out great with a nice smokey flavor baked into the crust. You should try it if you read this.
This weekend is a pizza blowout on the grill, prepare your innards.

Dig the blue colored font?

Thursday, May 19, 2005

Sopie goes oops!

NSFW but well worth the risk. I love it when celebs dresses just fall off their shoulder.

Fuck it's Thursday! Haiku motherfucker!

Today's Haiku or Haiku's brought to you by my new T-Shirt shop on Cafepress, FKD Designs. There's nothing there you'll wanna buy yet but it'll be the location of the HomeBrew shirts when that get's up and running.
Check it out those shirts are just the beginning:

Update on the brew btw... looking at doing maybe some form of Apple Oatmeal Stout. Just in time for summer? Yeah I know Stouts aren't really a summer brew but I don't give a fuck because it's always cooler in the shade. Well that and I'm all out of supplies for a decent hefeweizen, murp!

Here's your Haiku(s):

Sony can make bread
Nintendo keeps on trying
MS eats wallets

Ever eat rum cake
i have not yet but soon will
it smells real yummy

In other news graduation day here on campus. I can't fucking wait for my turn up there.

Friday, May 13, 2005

A penny saved...

Well the XBox 360 debuted last night to much fanfare and little else. I had already known what the machine looked like and was kid of turned off by it. Now that everything is out and about I kinda dig the design. It's curvy exterior sets it apart from other consoles and it clearly shows it's Japanese design roots with the layout. I'll be buying one simply because I have enough change by which to do it. Plus I'm a whore for this kind of shit and need my cravings satisfied.

So following the show I opened the change drawer to see what was in there and frankly I'm shocked. I have a shitload of change. I've been saving it since last August following the Vegas trip and probaly have close to $300 in there already. Add to that what I can save between now and November and I'm sure my shiny new 360 will be mine for nothing more than collected change from my pockets. Franklin once said "A penny saved is a penny earned" and I have made that saying a theme in my life. I 've paid for entire Christmas', trips to Vegas, and made car payments with nothing but saved up loose change. If your not saving your change shame on you. The next time your in a store and need an extra 37 cents don't bother digging for it just hand over a dollar bill and collect the change.

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

What's wrong with this?

3 No-Prizes to the first person who responds to this posting with the correct answer about what is wrong with this picture. Click on the link:

Friday, May 06, 2005

Water Bottle Soccer

Bored at work?

So am I so I decided to use one of the empty water bottles for a soccer ball today.

I won the office championship.

By default.

Because nobody else wanted to play.

Fucking simpletons, it's Friday motherfuckers.

Play water bottle soccer.

You may just start living again!

Thursday, May 05, 2005

Thursday's Haiku Corner

Elephant's mate. How?
the males penis fires away
like a jack hammer

I have a feeling this feature will draw millions of people to this little blog.

Team Binky
Pumpkin in basement
very warming, I dig it
hungry now for pie

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Me and my Audi S4

Forza Motorsports releases today.

My social life, whats left of it anyway, is completely all booked up now.

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

Lunchtime Beverage

Today's lunchtime beverage was...

Lime Coca Cola

All the taste of regular old fashioned coke but now with a lime twist aftertaste. Not bad, not great. Definitely worth a try.

Comment below on how utterly wasteful the last 30 seconds of reading this dribble has been.

In other news...

I want to buy a horse.
A Clydesdale,

and fuck you blogger for not letting me post a pic here. This shit should be easy yet you make it hard as fuck for those of us not PC savvy. Blogger is the brain fuck of the internet.

Monday, May 02, 2005

Sex's nothing more than a healthy life style.