We all have that dish on our table every year. Your aunt brought over some funky ass casserole for everyone to try yet no one does. And if someone does they say "Wow that was ummm... great for a once a year treat. Pass the gravy."
For me the dish that always get's me shaking my head every year is this broccoli casserole thing.
Now I'm all for broccoli and cheese but when you start adding shit like cornmeal to it the whole dish becomes ruined. I mean it looks like someone got sick and grabbed that dish before hitting the toilet. And it tastes bad. There's no reason to have 5 or 6 cheeses to a dish unless it's a pizza. For pete's sake parmesan does not have to be sprinkled on eveything to the depth of an inch thick. It's like biting into the Jersey shore with seaweed in the sand. I mean look at the stuff. Does that look like something you want to be gobbling down? Fuck no!
Another consumable that ends up on every table for Thanksgiving is Franzia.Yeah you know your in for an evening of fun when the box with a tap for a penis starts pouring it's insides into your mother's finest glassware. Franzia! Whoa look out! Aunt Sissy just unbuttoned her blouse, she's ready to get funky. Unfortunately Uncle Nut is half asleep in the living room with his left hand on the remote and his right hand on his cock. Franzia! Where'd those kids get that wine? Oh they thought it was kool aid and are now driving drunk while playing Pole Position downstairs in the basement. Franzia has the power to fuck up an entire room of 8-10 year olds in a matter of a half an hour. Trust me. The kids love it being drunk and their parents are too fucked up themselves to give a shit. Franzia, guaranteed to make your family event a complete drunken escapade where family members start cursing each other out over that time when they were 12 and the one put a tack on the other ones chair at the Thanksgiving table causing them to take a header into the stuffing.
So I ask you faithful readers what is that one dish that ends up on your table every year?
11 comments:
We always serve Seething Resentment Souffle with Unresolved Anger Issue Sauce.
Yum!
why am i getting hungry!!! that damn melted cheese!! lmao!
I'm telling you Franzia is the gateway to underage drinking.
I love my mom's stuffing...but she has to make me a special bowl without the parts. The other bowl has cut up pieces of the turkey's neck and gizzards. Nasty. Why the hell do they keep that stuffed inside the turkey in a little bag...throw that crap away. I hate parts.
I'm with networkchic -I toss the parts! We have 3 kinds of gravy at Thanksgiving -the giblet gravy (with the parts), regular grvy (no parts) and store bought gravy. Cause my extended family are picky asses!
Last years dish that showed up on the table that was a "wrinkle your nose spectacular" was some cranberry, rice and broccoli dish. It looked nasty, it smelled nasty and WTF with rice at Thanksgiving?
We don't do the Franzia -but we have a plethera of beer to choose from! From Pabst blue Ribbon (sticking finger in throat to gag) to Bud to Harp's and Sam Adams.
Giblet gravy kicks ass!
one dish---
that nasty ass bean cassarole aunt chrissy used to bring.
I guess I am the only one with normal Thanksgiving dishes...turkey, real mashed potatoes, awesome stuffing (no parts included), corn, homemade rolls, cranberry sauce. Yummy!
ROFL!! Very good... almost makes me wish it was Thanksgiving over here too. Almost.
Heh, Thanksgiving and my birthday are the only times all year that I get broccoli casserole, I look forward to it every time. Sure it doesn't look all that great (mom's looks nothing like that pic though) but that's some good eatin'!
I couldn't agree more with your description of how the broccoli casserole looks!!!
My mom's stuffing is amazing, but does include the parts. I pick out the giblets, cause they are just too nasty.
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